


They Go In Pairs

by Inrainbowz



Series: Between The Two Of Us - The Brooklyn Loft Chronicles [5]
Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec just want everyone to be friends, Established Relationship, Family Feels, M/M, Sibling Bonding, or friendly at least
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-17
Updated: 2016-04-17
Packaged: 2018-06-02 19:25:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6579283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inrainbowz/pseuds/Inrainbowz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>"All I want is the knowledge that I won't ever have to chose between the two of you."</i>
</p><p>Alec tries to understand the problem between Jace and Magnus. He is not asking them to be the best of friends, but he needs his boyfriend and his brother to get along a minimum.</p>
            </blockquote>





	They Go In Pairs

**Author's Note:**

> So, several person were curious about Jace's reaction in I'll Be There, and I was too, so here it is. I only read the first three books and the wikia info fo the three others, so I'm not so tune in what transpired between them then. Anyway, here's your program, enjoy!
> 
> EDIT: forgot to credit my beta for her work. Thanks to NightChanger for the corrections once again, sorry I forgot, I'm a terrible human being.

"I have to tell you, I invited Jace to hang out at the loft later today."

Magnus stood up abruptly from his position snuggled against Alec's chest. He kicked him in the chin in the movement and proceeded to fall off the couch and hit his elbow on the coffee table while Alec clutched his mouth.

"I bit my tongue" he complained, tears in his eyes. 

"My arm is numb" answered Magnus from the floor where he apparently decided to stay. Alec rolled his eyes and sighed, annoyed.

"Do you have to be so dramatic?"

"You told your brain dead friend who doesn't like me to come into my home. I'll be dramatic if I damn well please."

"Don't call him that. I happen to like him, and I live here too."

It was said with far more sadness than anger that made Magnus bite back a rude answer. He got up slowly. Alec was still sitting on the couch, elbows on his knees, looking Magnus in the eyes.

"Why did you do that?" he asked more kindly.

"I would like you to get along. Besides, I haven't been around the Institute much lately. I fear he thinks I'm neglecting him."

"And why is that so bad?" asked Magnus with a petulant tone he hated immediately. He didn't like to act so childish, but like everybody else, Magnus was victim of Jace's talent of bringing out the worst of him. Alec sighed, exasperated.

"Jace is my parabatai. He is my brother, my friend. I do like him, we're close, I like to spend time with him, and I miss him a bit. There are other people in my life beside you, you know."

"Of course there is. I don't mind other people, I mind that it's him."

"You know I'm over him."

"It's not that."

"Then what it is?"

"Okay maybe it's a little bit that."

Alec rolled his eyes and got up to pace the apartment, something he always did when he couldn't find his words or organize his thoughts. 

"That's ridiculous. You know I love you. Not anybody else."

"I just... I know a lot about old habits. And I don't like the dynamic of your relationship, I never did. He has a lot of influence on you. You would listen to what he says, you would do what he asked."

"So you fear he'll end up talking me out of dating you? First, thanks for the vote of confidence, and secondly, he was the one to encourage me to go to you in the first place!"

"But how does he feel about it now? What does he think of his personal shadow suddenly deserting him? Is he really so thrilled by it?"

"Yeah, because I didn't have a personality before meeting you. In fact, I was an empty shell, you're the one who put a soul there."

"That's not what I said."

"That's exactly what you said!"

They were both up now, facing each other in the middle of the living room. Magnus wondered distantly, like every time they had a fight, how did it go south so quickly. A few minutes ago they were peacefully cuddling on the couch, and here they were now.

He decided it was all Jace's fault.

"I know he has a hard time adjusting, and so do I. Our lives were completely turned around in a very short time, things have changed, not all for the best and yeah, I do want to remind him some things stay the same. I will always be there for him, and I really don't care what you think about it."

It had been the three of them for a long time. Jace, Isabelle and Alec, them against the world, the rest of their family safe in Idris, all planned. Then they had gained Clary, a lot of troubles, family revelations, and they had lost Max...

Alec closed his eyes and faced away from Magnus. It would never not hurt, he knew it, and it contributed to make it worse. He would never get free of this pain.

"Is it so hard to understand that I don't want to lose another brother? And don't you dare tell me that’s not what he is," he said angrily.

"I wasn't going to."

"Now that things are settled, we have to make it right. We have to find peace again, balance. I am spending the rest of my life with you Magnus, and Jace is part of my life. It's time we all accept it."

Magnus failed to answer, like every time Alec blurted such statements with absolute faith, like he was enunciating universal truth. Unfortunately, Alec, still turning his back on him, took his silence for a disagreement.

"I can't... It hurts. That you don't get along. To have to keep you apart in my life. Maybe it's stupid of me to wish that everyone would be friends but... it's not everyone. And I don't ask you to be friends. Just..."

His words failed him again.

"Just..."

Magnus took two steps forward and wrapped his arm around Alec's torso, pressing his chest against his back and his face in his hair. Alec put his hands on his and sighed deeply, some of the earlier tension easing out of his body.

"It's not stupid of you. And I know it's irrational of me. I'll make an effort, I promise. I'm sorry."

"We should have begun with this, before I dumped him on you. I'm sorry too."

"I don't think you needed me to rescue you or whatever. I thought you were amazing from the start, that's why I approached you."

"I know. I understand why you feel threatened, even if it makes no sense. And I know how hard Jace can be to handle. But I can’t choose, I can’t and I don’t want to. I don’t want to have to."

Magnus said nothing, only held him tighter. He kissed the nape of Alec's neck, a silent apology.

"You won't."

 

"Why can't we hang out here?"

Since they were sparring, Alec didn't have to resist the urge to smack Jace in the stomach with his stick, sending him to the ground. He rarely had the upper hand against his parabatai, but it happened, especially when the blond was being whiney and childish. 

"Do we have to go over this again? I live there. I want you to spend time there because this is where my life is. What is so hard to get in that?"

"Let's talk about it then, why do you have to live there? It's not even that official, you still have things here, isn't it still your home?"

"I don’t have to, I want to! I want to spend time and nights with my boyfriend. Shocking, I know. And don't tell me that you wouldn't live with Clary if you could, or have her live here.

"It's not the same."

It was a lame answer, but Alec saw red. He got closer, making sure to catch Jace's gaze.

"How is it not the same?”

It took a few seconds for Jace to realize what he had said. He fumbled with his words.

“Jace, how is my relationship with Magnus any less serious, committed and strong than yours?"

"That's not what I meant..."

"Isn't it?"

They had abandoned training now, their stick forgotten on the floor. Alec had his arms crossed against his chest, as a defense, a barrier. Jace looked a little lost.

"Maybe, I don't know! It's..."

The look on Alec's face made him regret his words immediately.

"I'm sorry, I don't... I always... I had a vision, okay? I always imagined our future like... find a girl, get married, have kids... For the both of us. It was a certitude."

"I am getting married and having kids,” Alec said. He was defensive now, hurt.

"I know, I know... But I'm... not over this idea yet. I guess I'm as bad as Robert on this, I guess I still thought..."

"What, that it wouldn't last? That I would recover my senses and get back on the right path? Well it's not happening. I am spending my life with Magnus."

"You can't know that..."

"Don't you? Aren't you convinced beyond any doubt that Clary is the love of your life? And it's okay yeah, it's valid and no one questions it, but for me and my love for a boy, suddenly I can't be sure!"

Alec felt terrible. He could pretend all he wanted that what people said or thought didn't affect him, it still did, even if he didn't want it to. It was nothing compared to what Magnus brought him, it was a small inconvenience, but he couldn't help it, it still got to him. And to hear it from Jace's mouth...

"Alec, Alec please listen to me. I'm sorry. I have trouble adjusting to it because I'm an idiot with archaic traditions set in my mind, but it's on me. I have no problem with it, I swear. I am happy for you, if a bit weirded out, I really am."

"That's why I want you to come. I want you in this life I'm building for myself. I can't not have you a part of it."

Jace put his two hands on Alec's shoulders, trying to convey comfort. 

“You have me. If you want to.”

Alec frowned at that.

“Of course I want to. You know I'm not abandoning you, right?"

Jace looked away at that. 

"I guess with all that happened... I think it would be exactly the same if it was for a girl. I just wondered if... with Valentine, Sebastian, all that passed between us, and Clary... I was wondering if maybe you simply didn't like me all that much anymore."

Alec took a step back at that, incredulous.

"What is wrong with all of you, seriously! Don't you know me at all?"

"What?"

"Magnus and you, you're just as bad! The two of you, how can you not be convinced of my love for you? Does what I say matter so little, don't you trust me just a bit? When did I ever gave you the impression that I was pulling away from you?"

"Well I haven't seen you that much lately..."

"Yeah, because that's all on me! You haven't been hanging out with Clary at all, for much longer than me I'd like to point out, you haven't make me feel discarded and unwanted!"

They paused. Had they talk about that before? Maybe not.

"I didn't... I never saw it that way."

"Of course you didn't." mumbled Alec darkly. "It was always going to happen. I was always gonna have to get over you and find something of my own."

"I know. I just never really thought about it. Maybe somehow I thought it would always be this way, the three of us, our life here."

"Maybe I did too. Things changed though."

"I know. I know they did."

"Listen, I don't... you don't appreciate each other much, fine. People can't be friends with everyone, I get it. All I want is the knowledge that I won't ever have to choose between the two of you."

"Is it something you asked Magnus too?"

"As a matter of fact, it is."

Jace ran a hand in his hair, sighing deeply.

"You're right. I'm being stupid, and I'm sorry. Let's go to Mag... to your place. I have to admit I'm a little curious to see you get all domestic.”

Alec smiled gratefully and they went to get changed and make their way to Brooklyn.

 

Magnus and Jace were facing each other on either side of the coffee table. Both were sitting deep into their respective chair, arms crossed and expression closed. Alec was rummaging in the kitchen, fixing them drinks and snacks for an absurdly long time so they could "talk".

"I promised Alec I'd make an effort," said Magnus with a voice as neutral as possible.

"I did too."

"That's at least one thing we have in common."

"You don't think we have anything else in common?"

Magnus raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"No, Jace" he said slowly. "I really don't."

They thought about it in silence for a long time and were a bit desperate to realize that it was true. They shared no interest whatsoever.

"Well, we do have Alec in common," said Jace, proud of his discovery.

"It doesn't count" answered Magnus. "Everyone loves Alec."

"Fair point. But not like we do."

Magnus frowned.

"You think we love him in the same way, you and I?"

Jace gave a short laugh.

"I sure hope not.”

And then, because in an incredible turn of events, he felt antagonizing, he added.

“You don’t know him like I do.”

Magnus didn’t miss a beat.

“You take him from granted.”

“You made him suffer, still will.”

“You put him in danger. Still will. Is it a competition?”

Jace almost had the mind to answer that yes, it was, but he had the fleeting vision of Magnus and Jace battling for the top spot on Alec’s list and how horribly sad and hurt it would make him feel.

“No, it’s not. It doesn't matter anyway. We both want what's best for him, to make him happy, and I think we can, at the very least, agree on the ways to make sure it happens."

Magnus tensed.

"Yeah?"

Jace seemed to sense his mistakes because he uncrossed his arms and leaned forward, unconsciously trying to appear more engaging. He hesitated, and that  
more than anything eased Magnus's wariness.

"I admit that maybe I had a fantasized future in my mind where Alec was forever right behind me every step of the way. Maybe I thought that we were enough, he had Izzy and me, he didn’t need someone else. But I'm not a complete idiot or a total jerk. I may have yet to fully come to terms with it but... he's happy with you. And I think you'll do everything you can for it to stay that way. It's a good thing, what you have. It has nothing to do with me. I can deal with my own issues, and I don't have a say on the matter. I would if I thought he wasn't safe, but he obviously is. And that's all you'll get from me. Your turn."

Magnus was stunned into silence, something that didn't happen often. He felt a begrudging respect for the boy - it must have taken a lot for over-confident-I’m-always-right and-perfect Jace to make that confession. He had to give something back.

"I don't like you much. At the bottom of it, there is still that. But I'm not exempt of petty feelings either. For a long time I thought I could never compete with you in his heart and it did make me resent you, especially seeing how you treated him."

Jace went to protest. Magnus stopped him.

"But, I understand there's more to it, to you, and to your relationship. I also know the kind of bound you share and how important it is to both of you. I have no wish of taking it away from you, and I will deal with your infuriating presence as much as I have to, if it pleases him. Is that enough?"

They looked at each other intently before Jace answered tightly.

"I guess it will have to. And let it be said that, regardless of our history, I don't like you much either. It has nothing to do with Alec. It's a personal thing."

"For me too. It's all on you."

 

For a reason Alec couldn't begin to understand, he saw them smile at that from his observing point by the door. He decided he wouldn't ask. It was probably the best they would get.

**Author's Note:**

> One day I'll have to make Alec look bad too. This is clearly favoritism, I love him so much, my sweet cinammon roll, too perf'.
> 
> This had morphed into those kind of OS you spend so long writing they end up annoying you, so I post it to be done with it. It's just that I don't like talking about things I don't have full canon knowledge about, but I don't have the time to read the books. So this is my headanon I guess. I don't know. I don't know why I'm so unsure about this. I DON'T KNOW. What. 
> 
> I'm Inrainbowz on tumblr. Coming up next is Ace!Alec, a thing with memory loss, a collection of AUs and more domestic fluff. Stay tuned! Thanks for reading.


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